What is Normal?

Over break, I've been catching up on some reading that I've had on my bookshelf for awhile...most of it having to do with collegiate ministry and young adults/ twentysomethings. One that I'm reading right now is Twentysomething by Margaret Feinberg. It's pretty general so far, but still a good resource for those working with students just about to graduate college or just out of college.

One point that Margaret makes is that we too often compare ourselves to others' progress. We hear about these AMAZING people in their twenties who are doing great, inspiring, meaningful things. They're starting businesses, have 4 kids, travelling around the world, or in the NFL. We forget that these people are not the norm. If they were, we wouldn't hear about them. But, because we have the internet and access to lots of things around the world, these stories are only getting more and more frequent. These stories often leave us "normal" people feeling like we should be further along in life, or that we're lacking in some area. But this is simply not true.

My generation is trying to achieve in 10 years what our parents achieved over their lifetime. We want the house, the furniture, the job, the position/title, the education, the travel experience, and the family that takes time to get. In order to not be the generation that is stressed out and pushed to the limits, we gotta slow down, take time for people (including our growing families), and learn to rest. And to enjoy God and His creation. Isn't that so hard?

Okay, so as an encouragement and reminder to myself and hopefully to any readers that are out there, I am going to start highlighting some ordinary, normal people who may or may not be making the news about their amazing accomplishments, but who are seriously impacting the world for the good. If you have any suggestions, please email me at tiffanydotmalloyatgmaildotcom.

Quarterlife Crisis

The growing trend today is to talk about graduating college students as having a "quarterlife crisis." Midlife crisises, as we're more familiar with, are when the tension of 3 conflicting desires climax: to have a successful career, to have satisfaction in your work, and to have a rich personal life (Guinness in The Call, 143).

Some in the media and church like to criticize the younger generation for being slow in growing up and lazy in pursuing financial independence. This generation takes time to choose what they want to do, are slow to settle down on a one-track career, and want immediate gratification in their jobs (instead of climbing the corporate ladder to meaningfulness). Could it be that we've seen the incontentness and midlife crisis' of our parents and other elders, and are protecting ourselves from that from the beginning? This is my thesis; we'll see how it works out in 20-30 years.

Community and Service- do we REALLY want them?

I've been reading a bunch of stuff about this next generation (both the one above and below me, since I'm kinda on the edge of both of them), and I'm beginning to doubt some of the research.

Two things that characterize this generation is wanting true community (honesty, vulnerability, family-like closeness) and opportunities to make a difference/change the world.

At the surface, yes, we do want those things. But, I think that these desires are being hijacked by our selfishness. We want true community, but only if it's OTHER people being authentic, honest and vulnerable. Only if we want OTHER people to be intentional about community. Very often will we be the first one to put our necks out. We want opportunities to make a difference, that's true too. But observations I've made from my own experience and listening to some others' experiences in different parts of the country: 1.) we tend to not like to serve when push comes to shove, especially when it's at an inconvenient time, it's not fun or glamorous, and it's not something we particularly enjoy doing. 2.) we tend to get excited about something, talk alot about it, and then not do it, or just do it once and then go on to the next new thing.

So, do we just WANT these things- are they values that we want to value, or are these values that are really characteristic of our actions?

Jesus' words have been ringing in my ears lately- I've not come to be served but to serve... what implications does that have on my family's life (family as in biological and community)? Conviction has come, and I must repent.

What do you think? Do we really want these things? Or do we just like the idea of them?

A Momentus Monday

Tomorrow marks 2 exciting events- I begin seminary and Aly turns 2 months. :)

6 months ago I wouldn't have guessed that I'd be enrolling in Asbury Seminary full-time. I had just applied, but thought I'd be taking one class at a time for the next 8 years. Little did I know that I'd get the opportunity to go full-time. I'm SO excited to learn and move towards the vision God's given me.

Tomorrow morning some of my friends and I will be meeting to dream about how to better help collegiates and young adults grow in their walk with Christ from the ages of 18-30. I don't know what the brainstorming session will hold, but I'm excited about it nonetheless; I'm thankful for the really creative, passionate, and twentysomething-loving friends that I have. Hopefully we'll have a clearer picture of what the next steps by noon tomorrow.

On the other note, I can't believe Aly is 2 months already. She's becoming slightly less cranky everyday, which jake and i are both thankful for. She still isn't the happiest baby ever, but I think as her acid reflux is disappearing, life is getting better for her. We've been getting lots of smiles and "coo"s lately, which is excellent feedback for tired parents. She's also been doing some major sleeping through the night (for her age) most nights, which also makes her tired parents happy.